Monday, December 9, 2013

RAW Review #2

So this week I got MY Xbone 720 (and Playstation 4) so I guess I have to do this weeks RAW review, as is tradition.  Similarly to last week, this pretty informal, a stream of consciousness, if you will.  There will typos, so forgive me.  Before I start might I say how silly it is to have the Slammy Awards as the "Go Home" show for this weekend's PPV, TLC? Bad for business, and as a stock holder, I'm not happy.



-  BUT HOW DO I DOWNLOAD THE WWE APP MAHGGLE?

-  My lady has a deep seeded hatred for people who say "WARSHINGTON" in stead of "Washington".  JBL just revealed himself to be one of those people.  Also on that short list?  My old coach Butch M. F. Davis.

-  As Daniel Bryan's hair gets longer, he starts to look more and more like wrestling Jesus.

-  Fandango has a new blouse.  Swell.

-  This hometown crowd is hype for DBRY.  Expecting "DAN-YULL BRY-AN" chants during the main event promos again.

- I always mark for the flying headbutt.  Shades of Crispen Wah.

- BUSAIKU KNEE KICKUUU!

-  DAH

-  I love Bray's promos.  Why can't WWE Films make a horror movie based on this character? I'd see it in theaters.  Bray wants Bryan's beard.  It is too strong to allow it to exist outside the Beardicate.

-  OH YOU DIDN'T KNOW?  Classic Dumb and Dumber suits.  Where have I seen them lately?



-  Vince has a weird puke fetish.

-  I legit LOL'd at the snake charmers spot.  Good thing good ol' fashion racism is PG.

-  No Kosher Butcher up for the LOL Moment Award? The fix is on!

-  The Rock isn't there to accept?



-  I'm going to stop commenting on EVERYTHING to prevent this from getting too long…

-  I like Big E on the mic, but he's a bit awkward at commentary.  That's a tough job.  Where can I get those shirts doe?

- HABEEB IN THE BUSINESS CASUAL SHEEL.  The Handsome Hounds of Justice.

- If anyone but Mark wins consider my eggs boiled.

-  DBRY sure got crossed a lot this year.

-  >>implying your vote matters

-  I wonder if DA SHEEL hosting the Double Cross award is foreshadowing something?

-  My eggs are boiled.  Shawn I love you but this is going nowhere… unless it goes somewhere…

-  Hopefully this match ends with Miz getting legit kicked in the head.



-  If Eva Marie wins I'm going to snap my laptop in half. 

-  I still might snap my laptop in half.  THESE BOOS THO.  This is ugly…  No hometown pop for Nikki!

-  I like Skip Sheffield and McGilicutty… I mean Rybaxel.

-  Just noticed HBK has the Miz's minitron.  Cannot unsee.  I do like the return of scumbag Shawn.  One more match?

-  Oh snap… Dbry is going to win isn't he?  ITS HABBENING.

-  Wait why the Superstar of the Year away happening at the top of the second hour?

-  The superior Sin Cara!  I'm actually REALLY happy for Hunico.  Knowing how much he loves/loved being a masked luchador, its good to see that the better man is under the mask now.  It helps that I think he's one of the more underrated wrestlers on the roster.

-  Did they forget to put up the Nelson Mandela spot at the top of the show? Or is Justin Gabriel about to come out and wrestle?


No more of this foolishness with the son of Haku.

-  DBRY WINS SUPERSTAR OF THE YEAR



-  Unrelated, I kind of wish they'd give William Regal some of the credit for Daniel Bryan.

-  I don't know why I didn't think Daniel Bryan watches football.

-  Can we just call Hunico Cara "Sin Cara II"? I feel like the original name is tainted.

-  The Thing is not imaginary JBL! HES REAL TO ME.

- Titus getting BTFO.

-  Wait the Houston Texans cheerleaders Fandango'd?  I need to investigate…



-  Daniel Bryan might get 4 awards tonight.  Superstar of the Year, Fan Participation, Beard of the Year… maybe MotY?

-  Ascension Ceremony? That sounds like something the Freemasons do.

-  Xavier Woods is awesome.  I worry about what they're doing with him though.  Not to mention JBL seems to bury him at the announce table every week.

-  I was right to worry.  A five second match.  Now I mad.



-  Heres someone who believes in The Thing.  Ambrose vs. Punk? A bright spot on this dark night!

-  Gotta keep Steph strong!

-  Pretty awesome match.  Pretty long match too surprisingly.  Obviously there will be no finish.

-  UH OH SHEEL IMPLOSION…  ITS HABBENING.

-  I'll be sad to see the Shield go.  I look forward to "Face of the Company" Roman Reigns.  I do worry if creative is competent enough to handle this breakdown, however.

-  Cool promo for a meh match up.  I do like title vs. title matches.  Too bad they've all but ruined their credibility.

-  The iconic lonely neck beard in the crowd holding the FOLEY IS GOOD sign.

-  I think Mick just said Hambrose.

-  These extreme moments are hardly extreme…

-  I'm hoping that the Uso's get a total divas push to go with their face paint push.

Because this went so well.

-  I love YEAHYEAHYEAHYEAH.

-  Not so good RAWs really drag out when your tasked to review them.  I could be playing my next gens right now.

-  Bret Hurt pls.

-  The fact the Punk/Brock isn't a nominee but Haitch/Brock is is disgusting.

-  MFW THE ROCK COMES OUT TO ACCEPT THE AWARD FOR ROCK VS. CENA.  IF I ONLY COULD MAKE A DEAL WITH GOD…

-  Divas match is main eventing.



- FFUUFUFUFUF ITS HAPPENING



-  Quickly! Cut to that clapping soldier and some children!

That match...

-  The RAW divas division is a joke.  AJ needs to just take her title to NXT and have a much more interesting title unification match.

- >Khali

-  Daniel Bryan's fw.  DONT STOP SEATTLE MAKE YOURSELF A STAR.

-  You guys realize this isn't a good thing for you JBL and Cole?  This is the audience saying the company is wrong.

- BURYING COMMENCES.

- THEY DONT WANT BRYAN THEY WANT BIG SHOW!  No?  How about Cena? Pls follow me ladies…

-  Bad place to have your not Daniel Bryan title unification.

-  The Roast of all the World Champions.

CENA YOU OVERNESS LEECH I'M MAD.

-  We shootin' now.

-  John Cena was not assumed into heaven during the Ascension Ceremony.  False advertisement.

-  Admittedly the breakdown at the end was pretty hype.  Despite HHH going over.

This RAW was BAD… and I expected it to be meh… which is sad considering that TLC (LIVE FROM HOUSTON) is this weekend.  Not only were the matches rushed by the forced award ceremony, but the general production of the show was predictable trash…  Although thought it was pretty cool that they had a crowd audible enough to call WWE out on its crappy fake voting.  Never the less, I look forward to going to Harmonic Convergence this Sunday.

Who will be the Avatar after the main event?!


What did you think of RAW?  Did you like it? Doubt it. But even if you did leave me a comment, or hit me up on twitter!

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